I have never had so much trouble with a hook/blurb before!
Becoming Brigid is to the stage where I must get it into a proof copy. But to do that, I need the blurb to go on the createspace website -- and the Amazon website, and the back of the book. The trouble is, I can't seem to figure out how to change it on createspace/amazon once it's set.
That means it's got to be good right from the start.
I've fiddled with book blurbs for this book for almost a year now, and I'm still not set on "this is it!" for anything.
Below are three options (although I'm open to tweaking any of them). Please vote for the one you think is best.
You can vote in the comments section (especially if you want to suggest a tweak), in the sidebar poll under my profile icon (if you'd like to remain anonymous), or you can tweet me (
Your opinion really matters, even if you don't consider yourself much into YA books. Just let me know which hook/blurb catches your interest the most.
Here are your options:
Option #1:
Pepper Kircy has plans for her future: a handsome husband, a degree in nutrition, and thousands of followers in the blogosphere.
Unfortunately, that future is currently clouded by her lack of dates, possibly brought on by her geeky, ghost-hunting father. Or that she wears a "nearly-A" bra.
But Pepper's plans never included Dougal. He's too short and probably too old to be her date to Homecoming. And he makes her question her perfect future -- as well as what she thought was her past.
But he actually seems interested in her; he whispers poetry and calls by her real name, the one she never uses: Brigid.
Dougal’s tempting. Tempting enough that Pepper can’t get him out of her dreams. So, in spite of all his weird talk about mysterious portals and the Stone of Odin, she could really like this guy. Maybe even enough to change her precious plans.
If he just stop trying to kill her....
Option #2:
Pepper Kircy has an embarrassing father who hunts ghosts, a neighbor who owns a mortuary, and a crush on the interesting new guy at school who just happens to be an actor in a popular movie series. Could he possibly be that perfect future husband who'd make her life plans work out?
But Pepper's plans don't include Dougal, the enigmatic and strangely attractive guy who seems to know way too much about a past Pepper doesn't remember. He's too short and probably too old to be her dream man, but he's tempting enough that Pepper can't get him out of her dreams.
So, in spite of all his weird talk about mysterious portals, Celtic deities, and a stone that's been missing for decades, Pepper could really like this guy.
If he'd just stop trying to kill her....
Option #3:
Pepper Kircy's plans for the future include a traditional family with a handsome husband -- even if she hasn't found anyone with potential to fill that role just yet. They don't include the ghost hunting her father enjoys or her continued failure to fill out anything more than a "nearly-A" bra.
And her plans certainly don't include Dougal, the mysterious guy from the fantasy faire. He's too short and probably too old. He confuses her with an ancient Celtic goddess. And he insists that her past includes a heck of a lot more than she can remember.
Still, Pepper can't seem to get Dougal out of her life -- or her dreams. So, in spite of all his strange talk about portals and missing stones, she could really like this guy.
If he'd just stop trying to kill her....
I liked option one the best.
ReplyDeleteI liked the first one the best. For some reason the whole planning for a husband thing really bothers me in the other two options. Less so in the first one. Could just be me! I so want to read this book though :)
ReplyDeleteOption 1 seems clearest.
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