Note: these ideas are based on what's NOT happening in the high schools in my own district and in some of the other districts in the Salt Lake Valley. I certainly hope there are places where high schools do some or all of these things; however, I will admit that I've never yet heard of some of these being done before. Feel free to comment.
1. Instead of spirit week, have ART Week. Instead of wearing school colors and having a pep rally before a sporting event, have finger painting/ water balloon painting/ mural coloring in the cafeteria during lunchtime for a week, have Dress as Your Favorite Painting Day, teach a different style of dance in the gym every day during lunch, have salt dough sculpting or snow sculpting competitions, have a sing-a-long assembly or karaoke assembly. Create an assembly where the drama students are in charge: skits, improv, gong-show, audience participation. Encourage teachers to have paintings/sculptures/drawings in their classrooms. (The art may reflect the teachers’ personal tastes or be related to their subject areas.)
2. Focus on academic instead of sports all the time. Announce totals of high scores for AP tests. Spotlight kids taking more than one AP class. Have academic competitions during lunch or assemblies: spelling bees, quiz-shows with students against teachers, logic puzzles. Give prizes and praise to winners. In schools with high populations of immigrants, spotlight kids who speak multiple languages. Give ESL students a chance to teach others their native tongues in clubs or free after-school classes. Spotlight kids who score 1700+ on the Reading Inventory test (and reward them by never making them take the test again, as they cannot “improve” beyond that score). Spotlight kids who get perfect scores on all required tests and reward them. Give attention those with 4.0s and/or those who improve their GPA by 1.0 during a school year. Celebrate the debate team and the chess club.
3. Encourage physical activities that are not based on the holy trinity of football/basketball/baseball. Have badminton or ping pong set up for lunch or after school. Teach folk dancing or dances from the past, such as the jitterbug or the cake walk. Have a walking or hiking club; get teachers to join in.
4. Have a community service week or term. Get kids out cleaning up parks. Turn unused grassy areas into a school vegetable/herb gardens and donate the fresh produce to a food bank or homeless shelter kitchen. Have service team competitions to spruce up yards for the elderly or disabled or for the local senior center. Require honor society students to tutor ESL students or elementary children. Get kids to rake leaves or trim bushes or clean indoors at the local library. Have a book drive for a low-income area elementary school. Foster a litter of kittens. Read books on tape for vision-impaired folks to use. Volunteer to wash dogs at the animal shelter. Spotlight kids who do volunteer work. Have a reward activity or treat only for those who’ve been involved in a service activity of some sort. Don’t make it about merely collecting money once a year for something; make it longer and vary the ways its done.
Showing posts with label School. Show all posts
Showing posts with label School. Show all posts
Saturday, April 6, 2019
Tuesday, March 8, 2016
Update
Yes, it's been awhile. Sorry.
Three of my immediate family members have had some serious health problems. Then my own body decided it was feeling left out and developed a few new weirdnesses requiring multiple doctor visits (during which time, two of my favorite doctors decided to relocate, forcing me to find new ones).
And school is .... well, in a unique situation.
You see, I've taught at a traditional junior high (grades 7-9) for many years. And, at the end of this year, our school will be absorbed into the nearby high school, becoming a second campus as the high school shifts from 10-12 to 9-12. There has been a good deal more durm and strang than usual with registering the 7th graders for a different junior high for 8th grade, registering both 8th and 9th graders at least a month earlier than usual for high school, and the interviewing of teachers for different job placements (as we cannot continue to teach at a school which no longer exists). As I have not yet been placed, I live in limbo, not even yet able to pack up my numerous files and such in order to move... somewhere.
All this means I haven't done one speck of writing or editing since last autumn. I've done a good deal of reading, though, so I'm going to try to post some book reviews and not let this blog die. :)
Three of my immediate family members have had some serious health problems. Then my own body decided it was feeling left out and developed a few new weirdnesses requiring multiple doctor visits (during which time, two of my favorite doctors decided to relocate, forcing me to find new ones).
And school is .... well, in a unique situation.
You see, I've taught at a traditional junior high (grades 7-9) for many years. And, at the end of this year, our school will be absorbed into the nearby high school, becoming a second campus as the high school shifts from 10-12 to 9-12. There has been a good deal more durm and strang than usual with registering the 7th graders for a different junior high for 8th grade, registering both 8th and 9th graders at least a month earlier than usual for high school, and the interviewing of teachers for different job placements (as we cannot continue to teach at a school which no longer exists). As I have not yet been placed, I live in limbo, not even yet able to pack up my numerous files and such in order to move... somewhere.
All this means I haven't done one speck of writing or editing since last autumn. I've done a good deal of reading, though, so I'm going to try to post some book reviews and not let this blog die. :)
Sunday, January 3, 2016
Book Review & Rant: Not If I See You First by Eric Lindstrom (Or What Happens When Authors Haven't Been In A School In A Decade)
Because I got it in my December Uppercasebox subscription, the first book I read in 2016 was Eric Lindstrom's Not If I See You First, a YA romance with a blind protagonist named Parker.
I was excited to read it, but I ended up rather disappointed. It's filled with stereotypes of what men think teenage girls are like and want guys to be like and how adults picture teen bullies. It's also clear that while Lindstrom "researched" by talking to adults at the Braille society, he never bothered to talk to real teenagers who are blind -- or their friends or their public school teachers.
In 2011, I ranted about authors who assume high school is like it was when they attended.
I did it again in 2015, with further comments here and here.
Now it's time to do it again.
Authors, if you're going to write about teenagers and school, you need to know what school is like in the contemporary world.
Mr. Lindstrom, if you're going to write about a blind teenager in 2015, you should talk to a few.
At our school, we've had a blind wrestling coach for years. We've had 3 blind students during the years that I've taught at the school, all boys. The first one also had developmental problems and was never in regular classes. But last year we had 2 boys in almost entirely regular classes; one of them was my student. And I can promise you, Mr. Lindstrom, that boy would laugh at some of the stuff you created -- because it's so wrong.
Let me go back to addressing the readers rather than the writers.
Lindstrom has 16-year-old Parker assigned a student buddy ALL DAY LONG, even though she's attended the school for two years and is fiercely independent. No way. No administration would put that kind of burden on a kid. Parents would sue. It's absurd.
What really happens is that a paraprofessional is hired -- if needed; every kid is different -- but teachers and students work it out in their own classrooms. My blind student last year had two seeing students with whom he preferred to work in my class when possible. During tests and for homework, however, the paraprofessional took over.
Also, Lindstrom seems to be unaware of technology. Parker uses text-to-speech on her phone, but she does not have a Braille writer for taking notes in class nor any kind of recording device. Again, this forces other kids to have to tutor her. This is not reality.
Lindstrom does not have any counselor or special ed teacher or administrator ever checking up on Parker. No adult seems to know that her father has died. No meetings are held planning her education and modifications. No teacher seems to modify anything for her. No teacher notices when Parker has a meltdown in the commons area and then she and her friends sluff school all day in a massive drama queen party. No one notifies Parker's aunt (her legal guardian). This is beyond absurd.
Special needs students have files and are assigned SPED teachers as file holders. Their progress is monitored; teachers are contacted as often as necessary and parents meet with them at least quarterly. A student who has a major meltdown would be emailed news to all concerned teachers within minutes. That student -- special needs or not -- would be with her/his counselor, the parent or guardian contacted, and friends calmed within a few minutes of the meltdown. Students who bolted from school in emotional crises would be located by the school police and their parents contacted. All teachers of a student who had lost a parent just before school started would be notified and asked to watch out for emotional needs. (Yes, I've had several students lose parents over the years.)
Also, Lindstrom has the jock bullies pick on Parker so her love interests can rescue her. It happens right by her locker. This is unbelievable.
First of all, it has been uncool for years to pick on the physically handicapped. Only once in my long years of teaching have I seen a physically handicapped kid get picked on (a wheelchair user -- and every other kid present came to his defense within seconds). Bullies pick on the emotionally sensitive or mentally slower rather than the physically challenged. And schools in the post-millenium world have security cameras. No bully is going to go on camera doing stuff as obvious as what happens in this book.
Do I recommend this book? Sort of. It's mostly a romance; if you enjoy high school romances, this might be for you. (Note: there's no sex or violence, but there's a lot of swearing, if that offends you.) The characters are fairly stereotyped, although Parker herself has a bit more depth. The pacing is good. And the book has been edited, which is always a plus.
If you're not a school teacher or a student yourself, the Hollywood version of high school might not bother you as much as it did me.
Give the book a try. You might like it.
In 2011, I ranted about authors who assume high school is like it was when they attended.
I did it again in 2015, with further comments here and here.
Now it's time to do it again.
Authors, if you're going to write about teenagers and school, you need to know what school is like in the contemporary world.
Mr. Lindstrom, if you're going to write about a blind teenager in 2015, you should talk to a few.
At our school, we've had a blind wrestling coach for years. We've had 3 blind students during the years that I've taught at the school, all boys. The first one also had developmental problems and was never in regular classes. But last year we had 2 boys in almost entirely regular classes; one of them was my student. And I can promise you, Mr. Lindstrom, that boy would laugh at some of the stuff you created -- because it's so wrong.
Let me go back to addressing the readers rather than the writers.
Lindstrom has 16-year-old Parker assigned a student buddy ALL DAY LONG, even though she's attended the school for two years and is fiercely independent. No way. No administration would put that kind of burden on a kid. Parents would sue. It's absurd.
What really happens is that a paraprofessional is hired -- if needed; every kid is different -- but teachers and students work it out in their own classrooms. My blind student last year had two seeing students with whom he preferred to work in my class when possible. During tests and for homework, however, the paraprofessional took over.
Also, Lindstrom seems to be unaware of technology. Parker uses text-to-speech on her phone, but she does not have a Braille writer for taking notes in class nor any kind of recording device. Again, this forces other kids to have to tutor her. This is not reality.
Lindstrom does not have any counselor or special ed teacher or administrator ever checking up on Parker. No adult seems to know that her father has died. No meetings are held planning her education and modifications. No teacher seems to modify anything for her. No teacher notices when Parker has a meltdown in the commons area and then she and her friends sluff school all day in a massive drama queen party. No one notifies Parker's aunt (her legal guardian). This is beyond absurd.
Special needs students have files and are assigned SPED teachers as file holders. Their progress is monitored; teachers are contacted as often as necessary and parents meet with them at least quarterly. A student who has a major meltdown would be emailed news to all concerned teachers within minutes. That student -- special needs or not -- would be with her/his counselor, the parent or guardian contacted, and friends calmed within a few minutes of the meltdown. Students who bolted from school in emotional crises would be located by the school police and their parents contacted. All teachers of a student who had lost a parent just before school started would be notified and asked to watch out for emotional needs. (Yes, I've had several students lose parents over the years.)
Also, Lindstrom has the jock bullies pick on Parker so her love interests can rescue her. It happens right by her locker. This is unbelievable.
First of all, it has been uncool for years to pick on the physically handicapped. Only once in my long years of teaching have I seen a physically handicapped kid get picked on (a wheelchair user -- and every other kid present came to his defense within seconds). Bullies pick on the emotionally sensitive or mentally slower rather than the physically challenged. And schools in the post-millenium world have security cameras. No bully is going to go on camera doing stuff as obvious as what happens in this book.
Do I recommend this book? Sort of. It's mostly a romance; if you enjoy high school romances, this might be for you. (Note: there's no sex or violence, but there's a lot of swearing, if that offends you.) The characters are fairly stereotyped, although Parker herself has a bit more depth. The pacing is good. And the book has been edited, which is always a plus.
If you're not a school teacher or a student yourself, the Hollywood version of high school might not bother you as much as it did me.
Give the book a try. You might like it.
Thursday, September 24, 2015
Teaching Like It's 1995
This school year, our principal has decided to make big changes to the advisory class system developed by our former principal. It would be tedious to tell you all the details, but let me summarize by saying that it now takes a great many meetings and a great deal of what would be called paperwork if we were using paper instead of Excel spreadsheets. Thus far, it's unclear that we've accomplished much other than making the principal happy and the students grumpy.
One of the big problems has been taking roll. Since the students are sorted on the gradebook attendance program by their "homeroom" advisories which they attend only on Mondays, there has been some kerfluffle about taking attendance the other days and getting it into the program. For a couple of weeks, we tried using Excel, but it would not sort the students alphabetically, rather sorting them alphabetically under the name of the teacher to whom they were assigned for that week only. (The assignments change every Friday.)
Finally, last Friday after a lengthy meeting wherein we tried to solve this and various other problems with the new advisory system, the principal energetically announced that she had the answer: teachers would take roll on a paper, and an office aide would come around to collect the papers, return them to the counseling center, and the counseling secretary would enter attendance into gradebook from there.
I blinked.
Then I locked eyes with the only other teacher in the room who knew what I was thinking: the Spanish teacher, who, during the school year of 1995-1996, had been my English student.
As other teachers began to discuss this "new" idea, she and I both laughed, remembering.
Twenty years ago, only the office staff at school had computers. Teachers had color-coded folders with a paper roll for each period. We'd take roll on the paper, put the folder into a clip hooked to the wall by the door, and an office aide would make the rounds to collect roll each period so the counseling center secretary could enter it into the computer.
"Progress" had brought us back full circle to 1995.
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Too Tired
Yesterday, we were using our new, district-mandated Chromebooks (which are mini-laptops functioning half like a Mac and half like a PC, with a touchpad but no mouse) to take the district-mandated SAGE test, a 9th grade boy clicked the wrong tab at the end of the test and then couldn't find his test score. He raised his hand, and I came over to help him.
I leaned over the Chromebook and said, "It's easy; just hit the 'back' button here."
I tapped the button with my finger. Nothing happened. Frustrated, I tapped three more times. No results. Both the boy and his neighbor watched me, saying nothing.
It took a good 15 seconds of tapping before I rolled my eyes in disgust.
"It's not a touchscreen. Duh," I said -- and used the touchpad to move the cursor to tap the back arrow.
Then the boys laughed.
I suspect I may not be getting enough sleep at night.
I leaned over the Chromebook and said, "It's easy; just hit the 'back' button here."
I tapped the button with my finger. Nothing happened. Frustrated, I tapped three more times. No results. Both the boy and his neighbor watched me, saying nothing.
It took a good 15 seconds of tapping before I rolled my eyes in disgust.
"It's not a touchscreen. Duh," I said -- and used the touchpad to move the cursor to tap the back arrow.
Then the boys laughed.
I suspect I may not be getting enough sleep at night.
Monday, September 7, 2015
This And That.....
The weather is FINALLY not roasting hot! I'm so excited. I hate extreme heat (yeah, I know; I live in a desert. I have to deal with it.). Temperatures over 95 or so -- especially when they don't dip into the 60s at night -- give me headaches and body aches, make my hands and feet swell, and keep me from sleeping.
This is why autumn is my favorite season: warm days, cool nights, no snow to shovel, harvest holidays and foods, family, beautiful scenery. It's just plain good.
School, on the other hand, is a bit tough this year. Oh, I like my classes well enough (three classes of mixed-grade Spanish 1, two classes of 9th grade regular English, and one class of 9GT English), but we have 14 new teachers, a school that will cease to exist (as it is absorbed into the high school and the younger kids sent elsewhere) at the end of the school year, and a principal who wants to push through all kinds of new programs all at once. Plus, the departure of our English department head left me with that position -- as well as my responsibilities as GT head, novels committee, leadership team, and the newly-created 9th grade team leader (although I'm hoping to share that one with the science department head to ease my load a bit). With all the new changes being unpopular with 98% of the faculty, most of the teachers are having to be cajoled into doing the new stuff (which is a LOT more work), and it's exhausting. There is, of course, the added uncertainty that none of us knows where we'll be teaching next year, and it's making the faculty much less at-ease than in the past. It's just not going to be an easy year.
All this means I've had less time to read and to write. I'd been packing in 12 or more books a month for reading, but now I'm only getting in about 5. And I've often been too tired to edit or write.
The (Dis)Appearance of Nerissa MacKay is just about ready to roll. I'm also working on the first major revision of its sequel, Nerissa MacKay and the Secrets of the Seventeen Scrolls. Plus, I have the barest of outlines ready for book 3 and book 4 in the series.
The Chocolate Smuggler's Notebook is on indefinite hold, although I did have a bizarre dream while I was in Norway last June, and that dream gave me an idea as to how I can fix the plot quicksand in which I'd gotten myself stuck. I wrote out the dream and a new plot outline while on the train from Bergen to Oslo, but I've gotten no further.
My next steps are to finish up the 1st Nerissa book, get some folks to do a cover reveal and giveaways, create some ads to put on Pinterest, finish putting together prizes for contests, get some folks to do reviews, and finish the first overhaul of book 2 so that I can get it out (I hope) within the coming year and thus keep readers interested.
This is why autumn is my favorite season: warm days, cool nights, no snow to shovel, harvest holidays and foods, family, beautiful scenery. It's just plain good.
School, on the other hand, is a bit tough this year. Oh, I like my classes well enough (three classes of mixed-grade Spanish 1, two classes of 9th grade regular English, and one class of 9GT English), but we have 14 new teachers, a school that will cease to exist (as it is absorbed into the high school and the younger kids sent elsewhere) at the end of the school year, and a principal who wants to push through all kinds of new programs all at once. Plus, the departure of our English department head left me with that position -- as well as my responsibilities as GT head, novels committee, leadership team, and the newly-created 9th grade team leader (although I'm hoping to share that one with the science department head to ease my load a bit). With all the new changes being unpopular with 98% of the faculty, most of the teachers are having to be cajoled into doing the new stuff (which is a LOT more work), and it's exhausting. There is, of course, the added uncertainty that none of us knows where we'll be teaching next year, and it's making the faculty much less at-ease than in the past. It's just not going to be an easy year.
All this means I've had less time to read and to write. I'd been packing in 12 or more books a month for reading, but now I'm only getting in about 5. And I've often been too tired to edit or write.
The (Dis)Appearance of Nerissa MacKay is just about ready to roll. I'm also working on the first major revision of its sequel, Nerissa MacKay and the Secrets of the Seventeen Scrolls. Plus, I have the barest of outlines ready for book 3 and book 4 in the series.
The Chocolate Smuggler's Notebook is on indefinite hold, although I did have a bizarre dream while I was in Norway last June, and that dream gave me an idea as to how I can fix the plot quicksand in which I'd gotten myself stuck. I wrote out the dream and a new plot outline while on the train from Bergen to Oslo, but I've gotten no further.
My next steps are to finish up the 1st Nerissa book, get some folks to do a cover reveal and giveaways, create some ads to put on Pinterest, finish putting together prizes for contests, get some folks to do reviews, and finish the first overhaul of book 2 so that I can get it out (I hope) within the coming year and thus keep readers interested.
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
And So It Begins Again....
In approximately one hour I will greet my first class of the new school year.
Deep breath.
Ready?
Plunge!
Deep breath.
Ready?
Plunge!
Thursday, August 13, 2015
And There Was MUCH Rejoicing
So, yesterday was our annual Faculty Meeting Of Doom -- the one that lasts ALL FREAKIN' DAY.
But, during the part where we watched a video message (an HOUR-LONG video message) from our superintendent, a miracle occurred: he announced we were cutting our amount of standardized testing in half.
No longer will our district be two and a half times ahead of every other district in the state with regard to how much testing we do. Nope. Now we will be normal.
Granted, this is still way more testing than we need, but we are pleased.
To put this in perspective, in the OLD days, we used to spend about three days every May giving kids one standardized test that covered all the core subjects. That was it.
Then, during the last five years or so, they forced more and more tests on us, so that by last year, each kid had to take pre- and post-tests for each subject each quarter of the year, plus the year-end test, plus the extra English tests (SRI and the DWA). This means that the average 8th grader with 8 classes was taking -- wait for it... -- up to 69 standardized tests per year (8 tests per subject for 8 periods plus the extras.) That was clearly insane.
Now an 8th grader can expect to take some 37 standardized tests per year -- which is still clearly insane, but not to the same extent.
Throughout the district, there was much rejoicing...
But, during the part where we watched a video message (an HOUR-LONG video message) from our superintendent, a miracle occurred: he announced we were cutting our amount of standardized testing in half.
No longer will our district be two and a half times ahead of every other district in the state with regard to how much testing we do. Nope. Now we will be normal.
Granted, this is still way more testing than we need, but we are pleased.
To put this in perspective, in the OLD days, we used to spend about three days every May giving kids one standardized test that covered all the core subjects. That was it.
Then, during the last five years or so, they forced more and more tests on us, so that by last year, each kid had to take pre- and post-tests for each subject each quarter of the year, plus the year-end test, plus the extra English tests (SRI and the DWA). This means that the average 8th grader with 8 classes was taking -- wait for it... -- up to 69 standardized tests per year (8 tests per subject for 8 periods plus the extras.) That was clearly insane.
Now an 8th grader can expect to take some 37 standardized tests per year -- which is still clearly insane, but not to the same extent.
Throughout the district, there was much rejoicing...
Saturday, August 1, 2015
Message To YA Writers: Schools Have Changed In The Last 20 Years.
I've written about this before: YA writers need to know what kids are like and what schools are like -- NOW, in the post-2000 world. But the problem has not gone away. YA authors who went to school in the 1990s seem to think that nothing has changed. Hello, people!! Schools are not stuck in a time warp!
When I went to school, we had mimeographed worksheets, filmstrips, and honest-to-gosh FILMS -- with projectors! If you 90s-kids-turned-authors read about that in a YA book now, you'd freak out. You'd call me old and out-of-date.
Then why do I keep finding stuff like this in your books?
Evil Librarian by Michelle Knudson is not a bad book. (It's way too much like Maureen Johnson's Devilish to be truly original, but it's funny in its own right.) But Knudson clearly hasn't been in a school since the turn of the century.
How do I know? Well, her characters sluff (skip class) repeatedly -- and the parents never know.
Perhaps there are still small, rural schools that have teachers take roll by hand, but for at least 15 years (longer in some cases), most schools have used a computerized attendance program of some sort. This means that parents can know within minutes (on their phones, iPads, or other computers) whether or not their kid showed up to class. And just in case that's not enough, most schools have automated phone calling that notifies parents at the end of the day if their kid missed one or more classes. Unless you have a clever student doing some hacking, there's no way a parent could go for weeks not knowing that the child has unexcused absences. What was possible in 1995 is not possible in 2015.
Then there's Cherie Priest in I Am Princess X. Her time warp crime? She has her protagonist taking a standardized test on a bubble sheet.
No. Just no.
Again, this might be a possibility in a small town. But this is happening in Seattle. You know, a student of mine last year had just moved from Seattle. Oddly enough, he'd seen computers before. Isn't that amazing? Yup, Cherie, Seattle schools have computers in them.
Yes, folks, in the 1990s, we gave kids standardized tests on bubble sheets and scan-tron sheets. These have now gone the way of filmstrips and cassette tapes. Most of my students have never seen a bubble sheet in their lives.
Standardized tests are given in computer labs or on classroom sets of chromebooks or laptops or with clickers. Our school still has a scan-tron grader gathering dust in a corner of the teacher workroom --- just in case there's an emergency and some teacher has to use it for something. However, it might not even work anymore, and it's only a matter of time before it gets scrapped.
Writers, just because you once went to school does not mean you can write about it without doing some research. Most YA has at least some of its action in a school. Isn't it time you got up-to-date on what actually might be happening in one?
We don't have chalkboards anymore, you know.
When I went to school, we had mimeographed worksheets, filmstrips, and honest-to-gosh FILMS -- with projectors! If you 90s-kids-turned-authors read about that in a YA book now, you'd freak out. You'd call me old and out-of-date.
Then why do I keep finding stuff like this in your books?
How do I know? Well, her characters sluff (skip class) repeatedly -- and the parents never know.
Perhaps there are still small, rural schools that have teachers take roll by hand, but for at least 15 years (longer in some cases), most schools have used a computerized attendance program of some sort. This means that parents can know within minutes (on their phones, iPads, or other computers) whether or not their kid showed up to class. And just in case that's not enough, most schools have automated phone calling that notifies parents at the end of the day if their kid missed one or more classes. Unless you have a clever student doing some hacking, there's no way a parent could go for weeks not knowing that the child has unexcused absences. What was possible in 1995 is not possible in 2015.
No. Just no.
Again, this might be a possibility in a small town. But this is happening in Seattle. You know, a student of mine last year had just moved from Seattle. Oddly enough, he'd seen computers before. Isn't that amazing? Yup, Cherie, Seattle schools have computers in them.
Yes, folks, in the 1990s, we gave kids standardized tests on bubble sheets and scan-tron sheets. These have now gone the way of filmstrips and cassette tapes. Most of my students have never seen a bubble sheet in their lives.
Standardized tests are given in computer labs or on classroom sets of chromebooks or laptops or with clickers. Our school still has a scan-tron grader gathering dust in a corner of the teacher workroom --- just in case there's an emergency and some teacher has to use it for something. However, it might not even work anymore, and it's only a matter of time before it gets scrapped.
Writers, just because you once went to school does not mean you can write about it without doing some research. Most YA has at least some of its action in a school. Isn't it time you got up-to-date on what actually might be happening in one?
We don't have chalkboards anymore, you know.
Saturday, May 23, 2015
Bad Grammar Makes You Look Unprofessional -- And Stupid
Just got this tweet from Historic Scotland:
Really? The archaeologists were clutching a goblet? Didn't that make it hard for them to dig?
This is called a "misplaced modifier." It can make even the most serious sentence hilarious.
The corrected version should read, "Archaeologists found a hand clutching a goblet."
A hand was found by archaeologists, clutching a goblet. How? Why? Find out in our blog about food, drink and sieges http://ow.ly/Ni2NH
Really? The archaeologists were clutching a goblet? Didn't that make it hard for them to dig?
This is called a "misplaced modifier." It can make even the most serious sentence hilarious.
The corrected version should read, "Archaeologists found a hand clutching a goblet."
Sunday, April 26, 2015
Eye-Roll Worthy Proof Reading Neglect
Social media is always problematic for English teachers; we spend half our time cringing at spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors. But sometimes these errors are so bad they become funny.
A few moments ago I found a pin on a Pinterest book board which bemoaned the fact that Tris (the protagonist) dies at the end of the Divergent series. (Note: I read Divergent, thought it glorified violence too much for my tastes, and ignored the other two books in the trilogy.)
Here's what this lady had to say about the part where Tris dies:
I cried when this happened in the book. Like historically cried.
Um... The book is a dystopia, not historical fiction. And, unless you can time travel, you didn't cry "historically" either. Actually, you probably didn't even cry "hysterically," but at least that's an appropriate hyperbole.
*rolls eyes*
A few moments ago I found a pin on a Pinterest book board which bemoaned the fact that Tris (the protagonist) dies at the end of the Divergent series. (Note: I read Divergent, thought it glorified violence too much for my tastes, and ignored the other two books in the trilogy.)
Here's what this lady had to say about the part where Tris dies:
I cried when this happened in the book. Like historically cried.
Um... The book is a dystopia, not historical fiction. And, unless you can time travel, you didn't cry "historically" either. Actually, you probably didn't even cry "hysterically," but at least that's an appropriate hyperbole.
*rolls eyes*
Monday, April 13, 2015
Our Teaching Staff Is Pretty Tough
So, the seventh-graders are doing a unit on superheroes right now, and our librarian, currently infatuated with photoshop, decided that he wanted to promote teachers as superheroes.
This is the result:
(Click on the photo to enlarge.)
They look pretty bad-a$$, don't they? :D
The man on the far right isn't really that tall, and the woman just to the left of him isn't really that tiny. (She said she looks "constipated" in the photo.)
The librarian never asks me to be in these. He knows as well as I do that superheroes never come in my shape. :P (Now, if he ever does Ursula the Sea Witch, we're good.)
This is the result:
They look pretty bad-a$$, don't they? :D
The man on the far right isn't really that tall, and the woman just to the left of him isn't really that tiny. (She said she looks "constipated" in the photo.)
The librarian never asks me to be in these. He knows as well as I do that superheroes never come in my shape. :P (Now, if he ever does Ursula the Sea Witch, we're good.)
Wednesday, April 8, 2015
Pieces of a Day in April
So, today was our first day back at school after Spring Break.
Very soon after the first bell, the teacher in charge of assembly planning sent out an e-mail about Spirit Week next week. Then she sent another correcting the first. And then a third correcting the second. Clearly, her week was going like mine was.
The problem was on which day to have "Twin Day" in which students were supposed to plan to dress exactly like one of their friends. Finally, it ended up being Twin Thursday.
A bit later, one of the newest additions to our faculty sent out this e-mail:
Several of us e-mailed back verifying we'd join in. Then it hit me: RED shirts.
I sent out this e-mail:
Several humorous responses flew in, but this was my favorite:
It must have been "shirt day" today, for, in my next class, a kid walked in wearing this awesome thing:
I laughed -- then made him hold still while I snapped the shot with my iPad. :)
The next "moment" came near the end of the day. With 3 minutes left in class, we'd finished, and I'd given the kids free time. As usual, many of them crowded near the door (which annoys me).
When I noticed one of them had inched the door open, I called out, "Hey, [name deleted], leave the door closed until the bell rings!"
Immediately, his friend turned toward me and called out, "He needs the door open; he's farting."
The first kid, presumably embarrassed, snapped at him, "You're not supposed to tell her that!"
So the friend turned back to me and called out just as loudly, "My bad. I mean; he's NOT farting."
Fortunately, the bell rang just then, so I didn't have to comment on the situation.
A few minutes after the halls had cleared, I was on my way to the copy room to get some test essay rubrics ready for Friday. As I passed the office, Mr. O., a social studies teacher, held the door open for me.
"Hey, thanks," I said. "How are you?"
"Great!" he replied. "It's already Wednesday!"
"Even better; Wednesday's OVER!"
"You're right," he said. "It's Thursday Eve!"
And on that note, for this Thursday Eve, I leave you -- with a smile. :)
Very soon after the first bell, the teacher in charge of assembly planning sent out an e-mail about Spirit Week next week. Then she sent another correcting the first. And then a third correcting the second. Clearly, her week was going like mine was.
The problem was on which day to have "Twin Day" in which students were supposed to plan to dress exactly like one of their friends. Finally, it ended up being Twin Thursday.
A bit later, one of the newest additions to our faculty sent out this e-mail:
Subject: Re: Proposed Spirit Week Themes
Random "new" teacher idea.
Let's freak the kids out on that Twin Thursday.
Everyone in the whole staff wear blue denim jeans and a red t-shirt. We will all be twins and they'll flip.
Don't tell them; just see if they notice.
Come on! It's SPIRIT WEEK! :)
Several of us e-mailed back verifying we'd join in. Then it hit me: RED shirts.
I sent out this e-mail:
Wait.
What if this is like Star Trek, and all of us wearing red shirts will be zapped off before the end of the episode?! Is this a secret plot?
Several humorous responses flew in, but this was my favorite:
Subject: RE: Proposed Spirit Week Themes
It must have been "shirt day" today, for, in my next class, a kid walked in wearing this awesome thing:
I laughed -- then made him hold still while I snapped the shot with my iPad. :)
The next "moment" came near the end of the day. With 3 minutes left in class, we'd finished, and I'd given the kids free time. As usual, many of them crowded near the door (which annoys me).
When I noticed one of them had inched the door open, I called out, "Hey, [name deleted], leave the door closed until the bell rings!"
Immediately, his friend turned toward me and called out, "He needs the door open; he's farting."
The first kid, presumably embarrassed, snapped at him, "You're not supposed to tell her that!"
So the friend turned back to me and called out just as loudly, "My bad. I mean; he's NOT farting."
Fortunately, the bell rang just then, so I didn't have to comment on the situation.
A few minutes after the halls had cleared, I was on my way to the copy room to get some test essay rubrics ready for Friday. As I passed the office, Mr. O., a social studies teacher, held the door open for me.
"Hey, thanks," I said. "How are you?"
"Great!" he replied. "It's already Wednesday!"
"Even better; Wednesday's OVER!"
"You're right," he said. "It's Thursday Eve!"
And on that note, for this Thursday Eve, I leave you -- with a smile. :)
Friday, February 20, 2015
Why I Have So Many Unused Sick Days
How to take a sick day if you work in a cubicle:
1) Decide you are too sick to go in to work.
2) Call supervisor.
3) Deal with extra paperwork/e-mails when you return.
How to take a sick day if you are a school teacher:
1) Agonize for 30 minutes as to whether you are sick enough to make this worth the hassle.
2) Determine you really are too sick to drive/walk/deal with kids all day long.
3) Call subfinder. Spend 10 minutes clicking through the menu to arrange for a sub.
4) Pray that a sub will actually be available.
5) Spend 45 minutes to 1 hour typing up explicit instructions for the sub, knowing that most subs display an underwhelming amount of intelligence when it comes to following rules and lesson plans.
6) E-mail PDF to school secretary.
7) Pray that the district e-mail doesn't go all weird again and that your PDF will actually make it to its intended recipient today -- instead of next week.
NOTE: The first 7 items must all be completed BEFORE 7:00 AM.
8) At 7:20, call the secretary and make sure she got the PDF and that someone is covering your classes.
9) Go back to bed.
10) Field e-mailed parent complaints because you're not there to do whatever it is they want you to check on, e-mailed administrator complaints because THAT ONE KID acted up for the sub (even though you left the sub specific directions on where to send THAT ONE KID and she ignored them and brought in the admin instead), and e-mailed kid complaints because you weren't there to answer whatever questions they could have answered for themselves by looking at your website.
11) Return to school when well for MOUNDS of paperwork, missing/stolen items, and a huge mess left by disrespectful kids and an apathetic substitute.
Yeah, my cold got so bad I actually stayed home today. This is my first sick day since last May. Really, it's usually easier just to go teach when ill.
1) Decide you are too sick to go in to work.
2) Call supervisor.
3) Deal with extra paperwork/e-mails when you return.
How to take a sick day if you are a school teacher:
1) Agonize for 30 minutes as to whether you are sick enough to make this worth the hassle.
2) Determine you really are too sick to drive/walk/deal with kids all day long.
3) Call subfinder. Spend 10 minutes clicking through the menu to arrange for a sub.
4) Pray that a sub will actually be available.
5) Spend 45 minutes to 1 hour typing up explicit instructions for the sub, knowing that most subs display an underwhelming amount of intelligence when it comes to following rules and lesson plans.
6) E-mail PDF to school secretary.
7) Pray that the district e-mail doesn't go all weird again and that your PDF will actually make it to its intended recipient today -- instead of next week.
NOTE: The first 7 items must all be completed BEFORE 7:00 AM.
8) At 7:20, call the secretary and make sure she got the PDF and that someone is covering your classes.
9) Go back to bed.
10) Field e-mailed parent complaints because you're not there to do whatever it is they want you to check on, e-mailed administrator complaints because THAT ONE KID acted up for the sub (even though you left the sub specific directions on where to send THAT ONE KID and she ignored them and brought in the admin instead), and e-mailed kid complaints because you weren't there to answer whatever questions they could have answered for themselves by looking at your website.
11) Return to school when well for MOUNDS of paperwork, missing/stolen items, and a huge mess left by disrespectful kids and an apathetic substitute.
Yeah, my cold got so bad I actually stayed home today. This is my first sick day since last May. Really, it's usually easier just to go teach when ill.
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
Things That Never Happened When I Began Teaching School Years Ago
1) "Ms. Shafer, can I just take a picture of the assignment instructions? I don't want to write all that down."
2) Instead of carrying a compact mirror or using the restroom mirror, girls pull out their phones and use the selfie function on the camera to check their make up.
2) Instead of carrying a compact mirror or using the restroom mirror, girls pull out their phones and use the selfie function on the camera to check their make up.
Monday, December 22, 2014
Random Acts Of Kindness
The final school week before Christmas break is metaphorically the second longest week in the school year (the longest being the last week of school). The kids are hyper. Teachers have no wish to begin new instruction with a long break looming ahead wherein the kids will forget everything. Some parents pull their kids out early, making them miss reviews and tests, which teachers invariably give when it's not the right time for new material. Kids bring presents for each other and candy to school, which distracts them. Hormones run high, as holiday expectations about their crushes mount (perhaps a poor choice of words there) into romantic and/or sexual fancies. Disappointment and jealousy often follow, so lots of girls turn into drama divas and lots of boys make threats or start fights.
Folks, it's a loooooong old week for teachers.
But this past Friday, the final day before the break, I was surprised twice by kindness.
Once was just for me individually: I received a small gift from a student. (It was a mug.)
This sort of thing used to happen all the time, years ago. I'd often go home for break with a whole bag of treats, cards from appreciative parents, notes from kids, and small gifts. But, over the past decade, with politicians and the media continually demonizing teachers, it's rare for me to receive even a candy cane anymore.
This student, however, is an immigrant from a country where teachers are traditionally shown more respect than they are here; that probably had something to do with it. And I was touched by the gesture. He was so proud to bring in the wrapped gift, and he wanted me to open it right then and there. :)
I don't need the mug, of course, but I found I really DID need the warm fuzziness of having a student -- and his parents -- give me a mug. THAT was an awesome Christmas gift.
The other bit of kindness involved the whole school, and I do mean the whole school.
Everyone arrived Friday morning to find every single locker in the whole school and every single teacher's mail box with a hand-made, handwritten holiday card on/in it. The cards were simple: just red or green construction paper and black magic marker with one of several non-religious greetings therein. (Mine said, "We hope you have a winter break filled with fun!")
There was much speculation as to who had done this (I had to assure several kids that no one from the office staff would have had time to do such a thing.), but the principal explained a bit later to the teachers. It so happened that an 8th-grade girl had approached her in November and explained that she felt bad that there were some kids at our school who would get very little for Christmas. She wanted to do something. When she asked if she could put cards on every locker, the principal tried to talk her out of it because our school has over 1000 kids. But the girl was insistent, and the principal gave in. Apparently, the girl enlisted the help of two friends, and together, these girls made over 1000 holiday cards, then -- with the blessing of the administration and the custodians -- taped them to every locker and put them in every teacher's mailbox.
True, many kids didn't appreciate it, and there were ripped up cards all over the place in the halls. But then other kids took pity on our over-worked custodians (two are out on long-term illness issues, and we're chronically short-handed right now), and these kids began picking up messes that other kids had made.
Still, most kids were impressed that someone had taken the time to make every person a card. I saw at least a few students carrying those cards with them to class. (I took mine home to save, even though I don't know the girl who made them.) It was nice to know that some kid had put that much effort into trying to make sure that everyone had at least one bit of holiday cheer.
I've been teaching a long time, and that's the first time I've ever heard of a kid doing such a thing. It makes me hope she'll go on to be a leader or business owner who organizes people into forces for good.
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
What It's REALLY Like During A School Lockdown
Our school made the news today for a soft lockdown.
School lockdowns often make the news -- because news media folks love to get into the danger zone, and the public freaks out if they think there's a chance of a shooting.
But the truth is that most lockdowns are mostly just annoying. Our school has been through a LOT of lockdowns in the many years I've taught there, and not a single one of them proved to be anything more than precautionary. Once we had to go into soft lockdown for 30 minutes or so because a student from a nearby grade school had been injured in an auto-pedestrian accident (broken leg or so, not life-threatening). The EMTs decided he needed LifeFlight for some reason, and the helicopter had nowhere to land except on our school's softball field. All our kids had to be contained while this happened. Another time we went into soft lockdown because one of our own students had been injured (again, nothing life-threatening) in the gym, and EMTs do NOT like having crowds of kids huddling while they work. It was near class change time, so we went into lockdown to keep kids away from the EMTs while they got the injured girl out of the building.
See? Most lockdowns are pretty mundane.
Have we ever had one because of a gun? Sure. But it was still not that big of a deal. YEARS ago, I recall that one of my students, S., apparently wanted to sell a sawed-off shotgun to another one of my students, C. This was to take place during lunch. Another student saw the weapon (hidden in a trench coat pocket) and reported it. S. took off running, but no one was sure as to whether or not he'd taken the gun. So, while the police searched for S., kids were put into lockdown, and all available adults searched lockers. No weapons were found, S was caught, no one was ever in danger.
Today was a bit like that last one, but things were easier because of the internet.
I have 9th grade regular English for period 4B, which begins at 12:30 PM. Today, three kids were absent, so I only had 35 in the room. (Note: in Utah, 35 is an average-sized class.) I have a no hall pass policy; only kids with real emergencies involving vomit, a bloody nose, or a contact lens get hall passes, so most days, no one gets a hall pass. Today was one of those normal days.
Period 4B ends at 1:55, but we went into soft lockdown at about 1:40. I locked the relocatable door, reassured the kids that soft lockdown meant there was no real danger, and we kept working.
The bells were turned off, so we did not go to advisory class. By 2:15, I was really regretting drinking a coke before 4B and was wondering when I'd get to use the restroom. Also by 2:15, the kids had had enough of English work, and I told them to stop working on their group research projects and just chill for awhile.
But school privacy rules mean that very little info was available, and the kids grew uptight wondering what was happening.
Thank heaven for Twitter! I pulled up the twitter feeds for the Salt Lake Tribune, KSL TV, KUTV, and KTVX. The first two were useless, but the latter two began to give us far more info than the school could release.
I read off to the kids that a boy from our school had had a gun and had fled, that he was somewhere east of the school, and that we were in no danger. This helped calm the kids.
The end of school came, but we were not released.
Now, kids are not supposed to use their phones during an emergency so that satellite communications don't get overloaded, but I made a small exception. I divided the kids into 3 groups and allowed each group 3 minutes to text their parents and such. Nearly all the kids obeyed and shut off their phones when I promised I'd let them do it again if we were still stuck there in 15 minutes.
We were.
And 15 minutes beyond that.
By then it was 3:30, and they'd been in my room for three solid hours. They were still behaving, but they'd been reduced to throwing paper at each other, and the room was getting pretty messy. (Oh well. I'll have period 1A do a quick pick up tomorrow morning.) I'd passed out all my bagged candy (teachers must buy their own candy; we may not be reimbursed for any candy), which helped cheer up the kids.
Finally, I saw one of the paraprofessionals at the door of the main building. Literally pushing a couple of kids back into my room -- and knowing the kid gunman was nowhere near the school -- I stepped outside my relo (with my keys in hand) and begged her to call the office on her walkie to ask if I could escort my kids inside the building to use the bathroom! (As it was a soft lockdown, kids everywhere except the two relos had been allowed controlled access to the restrooms.) She assented, and five minutes later, the head custodian, the intern vice-principal, the school cop, and the paraprofessional lined up to herd my kids from my door into the auditorium. From there I was able to take small groups to the restrooms. (Thank heaven!)
At just before 4:00 PM, we received word to begin releasing the kids. This was done classroom by classroom, and it took nearly 30 minutes to get them all herded out the front doors, with no kids being allowed to stop at lockers.
Outside were about 150 or so parents. Most were behaving, but some got pretty nasty, trying to force their way in to get kids' cell phones. While I was on door duty, not a single parent thanked the numerous police officers or any school employees for keeping their kids safe and under control for an extra hour and a half after school. Not one.
When all the kids were out, we left the police in charge of dealing with the crowd and the media, and we were called in to a faculty meeting. There we learned as much of the rest of the story as we were allowed to know (everything but the name of the kid -- but that's OK; all students will know it by tomorrow morning due to social media, so all we have to do is ask one of them). The police found the boy, and he surrendered. The gun was a toy. No one was ever in danger. But we did everything right.
So, what's it REALLY like during a major lockdown?
Mostly it's tiring.
Try to imagine being in a classroom with 35 9th graders for 3 1/2 hours without a single break. That's what it's like. :)
And I was lucky; I had 9th graders, not 7th graders. And it was a reasonably good class. They behaved pretty well, considering. They followed my directions. They did not go nuts on me.
All the same, I'm going to take a bucket to school -- just in case we're ever in a hard lockdown and we are forced to spend longer than 3 hours without bathroom access! (No, I'm not kidding. I've got a bucket ready to go for tomorrow.)
School lockdowns often make the news -- because news media folks love to get into the danger zone, and the public freaks out if they think there's a chance of a shooting.
But the truth is that most lockdowns are mostly just annoying. Our school has been through a LOT of lockdowns in the many years I've taught there, and not a single one of them proved to be anything more than precautionary. Once we had to go into soft lockdown for 30 minutes or so because a student from a nearby grade school had been injured in an auto-pedestrian accident (broken leg or so, not life-threatening). The EMTs decided he needed LifeFlight for some reason, and the helicopter had nowhere to land except on our school's softball field. All our kids had to be contained while this happened. Another time we went into soft lockdown because one of our own students had been injured (again, nothing life-threatening) in the gym, and EMTs do NOT like having crowds of kids huddling while they work. It was near class change time, so we went into lockdown to keep kids away from the EMTs while they got the injured girl out of the building.
See? Most lockdowns are pretty mundane.
Have we ever had one because of a gun? Sure. But it was still not that big of a deal. YEARS ago, I recall that one of my students, S., apparently wanted to sell a sawed-off shotgun to another one of my students, C. This was to take place during lunch. Another student saw the weapon (hidden in a trench coat pocket) and reported it. S. took off running, but no one was sure as to whether or not he'd taken the gun. So, while the police searched for S., kids were put into lockdown, and all available adults searched lockers. No weapons were found, S was caught, no one was ever in danger.
Today was a bit like that last one, but things were easier because of the internet.
I have 9th grade regular English for period 4B, which begins at 12:30 PM. Today, three kids were absent, so I only had 35 in the room. (Note: in Utah, 35 is an average-sized class.) I have a no hall pass policy; only kids with real emergencies involving vomit, a bloody nose, or a contact lens get hall passes, so most days, no one gets a hall pass. Today was one of those normal days.
Period 4B ends at 1:55, but we went into soft lockdown at about 1:40. I locked the relocatable door, reassured the kids that soft lockdown meant there was no real danger, and we kept working.
The bells were turned off, so we did not go to advisory class. By 2:15, I was really regretting drinking a coke before 4B and was wondering when I'd get to use the restroom. Also by 2:15, the kids had had enough of English work, and I told them to stop working on their group research projects and just chill for awhile.
But school privacy rules mean that very little info was available, and the kids grew uptight wondering what was happening.
Thank heaven for Twitter! I pulled up the twitter feeds for the Salt Lake Tribune, KSL TV, KUTV, and KTVX. The first two were useless, but the latter two began to give us far more info than the school could release.
I read off to the kids that a boy from our school had had a gun and had fled, that he was somewhere east of the school, and that we were in no danger. This helped calm the kids.
The end of school came, but we were not released.
Now, kids are not supposed to use their phones during an emergency so that satellite communications don't get overloaded, but I made a small exception. I divided the kids into 3 groups and allowed each group 3 minutes to text their parents and such. Nearly all the kids obeyed and shut off their phones when I promised I'd let them do it again if we were still stuck there in 15 minutes.
We were.
And 15 minutes beyond that.
By then it was 3:30, and they'd been in my room for three solid hours. They were still behaving, but they'd been reduced to throwing paper at each other, and the room was getting pretty messy. (Oh well. I'll have period 1A do a quick pick up tomorrow morning.) I'd passed out all my bagged candy (teachers must buy their own candy; we may not be reimbursed for any candy), which helped cheer up the kids.
Finally, I saw one of the paraprofessionals at the door of the main building. Literally pushing a couple of kids back into my room -- and knowing the kid gunman was nowhere near the school -- I stepped outside my relo (with my keys in hand) and begged her to call the office on her walkie to ask if I could escort my kids inside the building to use the bathroom! (As it was a soft lockdown, kids everywhere except the two relos had been allowed controlled access to the restrooms.) She assented, and five minutes later, the head custodian, the intern vice-principal, the school cop, and the paraprofessional lined up to herd my kids from my door into the auditorium. From there I was able to take small groups to the restrooms. (Thank heaven!)
At just before 4:00 PM, we received word to begin releasing the kids. This was done classroom by classroom, and it took nearly 30 minutes to get them all herded out the front doors, with no kids being allowed to stop at lockers.
Outside were about 150 or so parents. Most were behaving, but some got pretty nasty, trying to force their way in to get kids' cell phones. While I was on door duty, not a single parent thanked the numerous police officers or any school employees for keeping their kids safe and under control for an extra hour and a half after school. Not one.
When all the kids were out, we left the police in charge of dealing with the crowd and the media, and we were called in to a faculty meeting. There we learned as much of the rest of the story as we were allowed to know (everything but the name of the kid -- but that's OK; all students will know it by tomorrow morning due to social media, so all we have to do is ask one of them). The police found the boy, and he surrendered. The gun was a toy. No one was ever in danger. But we did everything right.
So, what's it REALLY like during a major lockdown?
Mostly it's tiring.
Try to imagine being in a classroom with 35 9th graders for 3 1/2 hours without a single break. That's what it's like. :)
And I was lucky; I had 9th graders, not 7th graders. And it was a reasonably good class. They behaved pretty well, considering. They followed my directions. They did not go nuts on me.
All the same, I'm going to take a bucket to school -- just in case we're ever in a hard lockdown and we are forced to spend longer than 3 hours without bathroom access! (No, I'm not kidding. I've got a bucket ready to go for tomorrow.)
Monday, November 10, 2014
All In A Day's Randomness
We teachers like to help each other out, sharing lesson plans, books, whatever. And because we constantly juggle with way too many balls in the air at any given time, sometimes we send out e-mails for help. I have, for example, been able to fill an art teacher's need for a couple of dozen empty, clean yogurt and/or cottage cheese containers by the next day -- since my father is an artist and since I do a lot of crafts and it is just our habit to clean and save all such containers.
Today, however, all of us on the listserv got two e-mails requesting items that were even more random than usual.
From the counseling office:
(Yes, some teachers do own their old caps and gowns, but not too many teachers happen to keep theirs at school.)
And from a math teacher:
(Femurs. Okey-dokey. I'll see what I can do. Hmmm..... maybe the neighbors' dogs.... *grins evilly*)
(PS. Yes, at least two of us English teachers are geeky enough to know that he misquoted Hamlet in his first sentence.)
Yup. I bet all you folks who work in offices never get e-mails like these. :D
Today, however, all of us on the listserv got two e-mails requesting items that were even more random than usual.
From the counseling office:
We are planning on doing “Graduation Selfies” today (and the rest of the week) during lunches. The Jostens rep has not returned my emails so as of right now we only have my one black graduation robe. Do any of you have a robe and/or cap here at school???
(Yes, some teachers do own their old caps and gowns, but not too many teachers happen to keep theirs at school.)
And from a math teacher:
I need femurs, preferably from animals that have passed this mortal coil. Chicken femurs would work very well but any femur from any animal would be welcome. If it still has bits and pieces of gore attached, no problem; I have my ways of cleaning up a crime scene… I mean… a science lab. I have given myself time to gather my requisite materials, so keep me in mind the next time you have a chicken dinner (or turkey this Thanksgiving) or a Xmas fancy for meat pies (Sweeny Todd). A human femur would be cool… even if it is plastic.
(Femurs. Okey-dokey. I'll see what I can do. Hmmm..... maybe the neighbors' dogs.... *grins evilly*)
(PS. Yes, at least two of us English teachers are geeky enough to know that he misquoted Hamlet in his first sentence.)
Yup. I bet all you folks who work in offices never get e-mails like these. :D
Saturday, November 1, 2014
Usually I'm Apathetic About Team Sports....
.... but when a former student of mine becomes chaser for the Utah State University quidditch team, I do feel a bit proud. :)
(Yes, he's holding a broomstick between his legs.)
Friday, September 26, 2014
This Pretty Much Sums Up An English Teacher's Life
Got this tweet the other day:
Yep, I feel for ya, Sista. Been there, done that, bought the tee-shirt.
Dianne T. Richardson
I am in grading hell. And there is no light. There's not even a tunnel. Just a black pit of failure to follow directions.
Yep, I feel for ya, Sista. Been there, done that, bought the tee-shirt.
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