Sunday, April 1, 2012

42-- A Little April Fools' Day On Goodreads Today

I actually loathe April Fools' Day, but I do enjoy a bit of literary humor.  So, for all you Douglas Adams' fans, here's the Goodreads bit of April Fooling for today:


Today, we'd like to spotlight our newest open position:
Hyperintelligent Pandimensional Mice
Goodreads, a US Top 150 site and the 10th largest social networking site in the galaxy, is seeking Hyperintelligent Pandimensional Mice to take charge of the Goodreads Recommendation Engine, the third greatest supercomputer in the Universe of Space and Time designed to answer the Ultimate Question of What People Like to Read Next. Qualified mice should be comfortable analyzing the mind-boggling 20 billion data points of reader likes and dislikes recorded in the Goodreads catalog to calculate the staggering improbability of reader interest in any given book.
Note: We will also consider qualified dolphins for this position.

Required Skills:

  • Proficient with SEP fields, bistromath, and complex functions involving telephone numbers.
  • Knowledge of the Great Hyperlobic Omni-Cognate Neutron Wrangler operating system.
  • Ability to predict personality problems to ten decimal places.
  • Quick learner, must be able to pick up frighteningly elegant new technologies quickly.
  • Experience with protrusion into other reading dimensions a plus.
  • Must carry own towel.

We Prefer Applicants Who:

  • Are not prone to panicking.
  • Come equipped with own Babel fish.
  • If cybernetic, come loaded with pleasant GPP.
  • Know better than to muck about in hyperspace.

About Goodreads:

  • Our environment is highly supportive, friendly, and mostly harmless.
  • We are the galaxy's largest site for readers, froods, and book recommendations.
  • Our mission is to help people find and share books they love. Along the way, we plan to improve the process of reading and learning throughout the galaxy.
  • Great location: Our office in downtown San Francisco, catty-corner from the Restaurant at the End of the Universe, is always stocked with cheese and an infinite supply of ballpoint pens.
  • Our office culture includes a Brockian Ultra Cricket league, frequent trips to Disaster Area concerts, and regular Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster happy hours.
Please submit your résumé. You can also submit the following additional information now, or if you would prefer, later in our interview process: A code sample and a paragraph or two about why you want to work for Goodreads. For a limited time, we are offering state-of-the-art digital watches as a signing bonus. Don't wait, come sass us today!
Apply now! And please spread the word to any qualified candidates.

1 comment:

  1. I'm applying. I've often been told I'm a mouse, not a man.

    ReplyDelete